PORN RUMOURS : How do I make money travelling around the globe by simply having fun and being grateful for every moment of my time.

Unfair gossips, jealousy and prejudice.

I let go those very uncomfortable incidents when words of unexplained judgement affected my personal universe and I forgive people who have consciously or not consciously created them.

Being born in a little Polish post communist catholic town, where there is literally nothing to do,  there’s not even a cinema to pop into, people would often find some unrefined form of entertainment. Since there is nor spiritual, neither artistic movement in where I was born, the locals would simply watch a lot of tv, especially highly manipulated by the media news, drink, eat  ( I see my age mates getting fatter and fatter year by year, common guys go to gym!) and gossip.

Most of my age mates are married, with kids and already starting to age in a really visible way. Their life is very stable. I hope they are happy with the choice of lifestyle that they lead. Personally I would never get satisfied if I was to live to my whole life where I was born, but I understand this is me and some people are simply happy or comfortable where they are.

Koronowo, where I was raised up have always found me some enemies, even from my super early years. I always felt different and I always liked to stick out of the crowd. Many people didn’t like my positive energy, nor they liked the way I dressed and the way I exposed my body. I’ve always had people talking evil things on me and threatening me under the pressure. I’ve been beaten few times for “being too happy” and I had experienced moments where someone I’ve never seen in life would come up to me and promptly slap my face in front of everyone.  I used to receive abusing calls. More than that, I was called a whore by many even though I have only slept with only one guy from the town and it was my exboyfriend.

Peer pressure would make me feel undervalued, yet it made me stronger. Despite my bad experience I do not hold any anger against my ex oppressors because I understand that they were raised up in certain belief and conditions, where the universe does not provide them with vast horizons like I am provided.

I forgive them and I wish them more real happiness and love in life.

When I was little I promised myself I am gonna run as far away from this dead end place as possible. So this is exactly what I did.

Once I finished college I started my travelling adventure that has been on and on up to this day. I’ve lived and worked in many countries doing variety of jobs, including modelling, hosting, image, dancing and Public Relations.  Beyond, I did 3 months of a volunteer job in Brazil where I was working with people afflicted with HIV, abandoned children and the homeless. I’ve  gladly acquired speaking 6 languages and I am so happy and grateful to have learnt the languages of the countries where I’ve lived the longest. It’s so awesome when you can speak foreign language with foreigners, becoming a part of their identity and depuzzling the language into the particles.

During my blissful  trips I’ve had rollercoasters of crazy moments.  Sometimes it happened that I used to be super broke, like for example in Japan, where  all I had was 10£ in my pocket when I arrived to the Narita airport. In fact, I had a contract to work as a hostess in a karaoke bar in a little town 30min from Tokyo. However, the karaoke bar  came out to be horrible and was completely not like I had imagined before arriving. In real the bar  seemed   like a cheap brothel  rather than a karaoke thing and it was apparently owned by a local mafioso. Even though everyone in that club was super friendly, the conditions were bothering me too much. I don’t work in some shitty places, not in this life.On my third day I’ve decided I am not gonna spend any day longer it that place, so  I literally escaped without letting anyone know and to my luck I immediately found a new job in a cool bar in an amazing location of one the most expensive areas in Tokyo called Ginza.  Fortuitously, the manager of the new bar let me stayed at his place until I made enough money to rent something on my own. Due to the fact that at the beginning of my stay in Japan I was still broke ,in order to save on money instead of taking metro, I would first walk  everyday 3hr one way to work and once I was gifted my pink bike I would cycle 1hr both ways almost everyday.

I’ve had moments dealing with the poorest of the poorest in favella and I had moments of flying private jets thanks to the hospitality of my wealthy friends. I never felt a doubt or a fear of going somewhere new. I always trusted my luck and my attitude, I’ve managed to go through any obstacle on my way.

About a year ago I started doing photography, in which, people say I am really good at, yet I realized it is not something I wanna do for living. It took me a little journey to realise that I am suppose to make music and play. I’ve always enjoyed to parties and dancing the most in my life. I love to play, mix my favourite tracks , share my light vibe and my goal is to eventually create something by my own. The universe without me asking for provides me with so many amazing opportunities evolve in this direction and time by time opens gates to the certain stages of my career ( or however else you call it). Music is something I’ve been recently giving all my energy to.

Despite the fact that I am never back in the town where I was born, I do not have contact with anyone who I used to be friends with back in the days, people continue to gossip and they know better what am I currently up to. I used to be labeled an escort, since I do post a lot of photos of my travelling destinations and most recently I was labeled a porn actress. How delightful to know I am such an interesting person to be talked about.

To make it clear, I have never recorded any porn movies. Notwithstanding I did two art works, where I am fully naked and my body is captured in a really beautiful, sublime way that has nothing to do with porn. Even though I love my body and I always liked to express my sexuality I would never do any form of porn because, first of all, I am aware that watching porn kills grey matter and it gives a very distorted view of what love/sex really is. Making love/sex should be something done with a connection, even  if it’s at the primitive level, there must be some.

Personally, I don’t care about the opinion of people who judge me, because I do not judge others.  I am greatly not affected by the rumours. However I do really care about my family and it makes me fell sad when my family relationship has to suffer because of it. In a little town people gossip, I am not there but my siblings are and they have to listen to this evil talk, which  I feel super sorry for. I really love my family and I want them to be happy. However, there’s nothing I can do about it, I am not gonna change my lifestyle because I love my life the way it is and all I am asking for from my family side is UNDERSTANDING, LOVE, and SUPPORT. I do have sophisticated dreams and I will fight hard to achieve them.

The reasons why I am able to travel to the  furthest parts of the world and experience so much in my life because I am a very grateful and positive person. Everyday when I wake up, the first thing I do, I stay grateful to the creator for having legs and arms to move and eyes that let me see. I am grateful to be and I am grateful to have food everyday. I am grateful for warmth at home and I am grateful for the running water in my tap. Everyday I am thinking about all good people I have met in my life, and there has been many of them, who helped me out, advised me and gave me comforts of amazing moments. Every day I am grateful for material things I posses.

And if there’s something new I want to achieve, experience, or get, I NEVER WORRY, I focus on imagining only the perfect results I want to have. I attract it  with my mind and  if I actually give some effort to it, miraclously whatever I want, simply happens. That’s the power of positive thinking.grateful grateful3

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1 Comment

  1. Dear Marcelina, your way of living is request very courage and determinacion…I always read your posts and like a lot your way to see things in life, your corage to do the things and your spirituality way. I send a lot of good thoughts and good energy from Brazil! I am very proud to share a little moments whif you in Ibiza. I will always remember that and i will always remember your blue yes! I am married now whif a very beautiful and nice girl from Romania and she has a jealous about you, but if you need something and i could help you it will be a very pleasurefor me. Live the live intensaly beautiful angel!!! Kisses from Brazil!

    Like

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